＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊ 1940 stage version ＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊
[Verse]
HE: When you're out in smart society
  And you suddenly get bad news,
  You mustn't show anxiety
SHE: And proceed to sing the blues.
HE: For example, tell me something sad,
  Something awful, something grave,
  All I'll show you how a Raquet Club lad
  Would behave.

[Refrain 1]
SHE: Have you heard the coast of Maine
  Just got hit by a hurricane?
HE: Well, did you evah!
  What a swell party this is.
SHE: Have you heard that poor, dear Blanche
  Got run down by an avalanche?
HE: Well, did you evah!
  What a swell party this is.
  It's great, it's grand.
  It's Wonderland!
  It's tops, it's first,
  It's DuPont, It's Hearst!
  What a soup, what fish,
  That meat, what a dish!
  What salad, what cheese!
SHE: Pardon me one moment, please,
  Have you heard that Uncle Newt
  Forget to open his parachute?
HE: Well, did you evah!
  What a swell party this is.
SHE: Old Aut Susie (Miss Pringle) just came back
  With her child and the child is black.
HE: Well, did you evah!
  What a sell party this is.

[Refrain 2]
HE: Have you heard t's in the stars
  Next July we colide with marth?
SHE: Well, did you evah!
  What a swell party this is.
HE: Have you heard that Gramdma Doyle
  Thought the Flit was her mineral oil?
SHE: Well, did you evah!
  What a swell party this is.
  Wha daiquiris！
  What sherry! Please!
  What Burgundy!
  What great Pommery!
  What brandy, wow!
  What whiskey, here's how!
  What gin and what beer!
HE: Will you sober up, my dear?
  Have you heard Professor Munch
  Ate his wife and divorced his lunch?
SHE: Well, did you evah!
  What a swell party this is.

[Refrain 3]
SHE: Have you heard that poor old Ted
  Just turned up in an oyster bed?
HE: Well, did you evah!
  What a swell party this is.
SHE: Lily Lane has lousy luck,
  She was there when the light'ning stuck.
HE: Well, did you evah!
  What a swell party this is.
  It's fun, it's fine,
  It's divine.
  It's smooth, it's smart.
  It's Rodgers, it's Hart!
  What debs, what stags!
  What gossip, what gags!
  What feathers, what fuss!
SHE: Just between the two of us.
  Reggie's rather scatterbrained.
  He dove in when the pool wad drained.
HE: Well, did you evah!
  What a swell party this is.
SHE: Mrs. Smith in her new Hup
  Crossed the bridge when the bridge was up.
HE: Well, did you evah!
  What a swell party this is.


[Refrain 4]
HE: Have you heard that Mrs. Cass
  Had three beers and then ate the glass?
SHE: Well, did you evah!
  What a swell party this is.
HE: Have you heard that Captain Craig
  Breeds termites in his wooden leg?
SHE: Well, did you evah!
  What a swell party this is.
  It's fun, it's fresh,
  It's post-Depresh,
  It's Shangri-la.
  It's Harper's Bazaar!
  What clothes, quil chic!
  What pearls, they're the peak!
  What glamour, what cheer!
HE: This will simply slay you, dear.
  Kitty isn't paying calls,
  She slipped over Niagara Falls.
SHE: Well, did you evah!
  What a swell party this is.
HE: Have you heard that Mayor Hague
  Just came down with bubonic plague?
SHE: Well, did you evah!
  What a swell party this is.



＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊ 1956 film version ＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊
MIKE: I have heard among this clan
  You are called the forgotten man
DEXTER: Is that what they're saying? Well, did you ever
  What a swell party this is
MIKE: And have you heard the story of
  A boy, a girl, unrequited love
DEXTER: Sounds like pure soap opera
MIKE: I may cry
DEXTER: Tune in tomorrow
  What a swell party this is
  What frills, what frocks
MIKE: What broads!
DEXTER: What furs, what rocks!
MIKE: They're beautiful
DEXTER: Why, I've never seen such gaity
MIKE: Neither have I
DEXTER: Its all just too, too exquis, really
MIKE: This french champagne
DEXTER: Domestic
MIKE/DEXTER: So good for the brain
MIKE: That's what I was going to say
DEXTER: You know you're a brilliant fellow?
MIKE: Why, thank you
DEXTER: Drink up, chap
  And please don't eat that glass, my friend
  Have you heard about dear Blanche?
  Got run down by an avalanche
MIKE: No!
DEXTER: Oh, don't worry, she's a game girl, you know
  Got up and finished 4th
MIKE: This kid's got guts
DEXTER: Having a nice time? Grab a line
MIKE: Have you heard that Mimsie Starr
DEXTER: Oh, what now?
MIKE: She got pinched in the Astor bar
DEXTER: Sauced again, eh?
MIKE: She was stoned
DEXTER: Well, did you ever?
MIKE: Never!
DEXTER/MIKE: What a swell party this is!
MIKE: It's great
DEXTER: Ah, it's great
MIKE: It's grand
DEXTER: So grand
MIKE/DEXTER: It's wonderland!
  La da da da...
DEXTER: We sing
MIKE: Oh, we sing
DEXTER: So rare
MIKE: So rare
DEXTER/MIKE: Like old Camembert
  Like Baba au Rhum!
DEXTER: Bababababum
MIKE: Don't dig that kind of crooning, chum!
MIKE/DEXTER: Have you heard, it's in the stars
  Next July we collide with Mars?
  Well, did you ever?
  What a swell party, a swell party
  A swellegant, elegant party this is!
DEXTER: I drink to your health
MIKE: Nah, lets drink to your wealth
DEXTER: You're my bon ami
MIKE: Hey, that's french
DEXTER: Liberty
DEXTER/MIKE: Fraternity
  Have you heard, it's in the stars
  Next July we collide with Mars?
  Well, did you ever?
  What a swell party, swell party
  Swellegant, elegant party this is!